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Research Presentation:


Textual analysis draft:



Responding to peers:


Responses to sample textual analysis

~Image Theater
http://www.bubbleply.com/player.aspx?pid=daa6f641-44bf-4fb6-ae43-0f81fc1192e4
  • The emotional reading of the poem sets up a powerful scene...it makes the audience want to know what it coming next. It almost seems like a poetry slam reading with the way you really keep a beat. This is a really interesting way to interpret the poem (not one that I would have thought of on my own!) Great job!
  • The movements in the background help the audience see what's going on in the poem. This was really cool! Could you have incorporated more of this throughout?
~Reader's Theater
  • The pounding in the background automatically grabs my attention. This seems powerful and suspenseful!
  • The use of different voices and multiple voices at once emphasizes things that may be important.
  • Some of the reading of the lines are very powerful and suspenseful, while others seem not to be. Was this done on purpose? How could you make the entire reading seem powerful and go along with the pounding in the background?
  • This is a very interesting take on the poem and is very original!
~Dell essay

  • Overall, this essay is well written. You do a good job of picking small details out of the ad and telling the reader what they mean and why they are there.
  • One thing that might make your paper stronger would be to tighten it up. For example, you talk about the leaves in multiple spots on your essay. Perhaps, you could devote a paragraph to each major part of the essay you want to discuss. You could do a paragraph on the leaves in which you discuss their significance, then you could do a paragraph on the typeface, etc.
  • Check your grammar (esp. usage of they're, there, and their)
~Subvertisement
  • I like your analysis of the shoe ad, and I believe that you hit it right on. But, how do we KNOW this truth about the ad? Could you have Photoshopped the shoes onto some kind of background that helps to demonstrate your point?
  • I really like what you've done with the Captain Morgan ad. You've manipulated the image in a way that makes a strong statement ('jail time' and putting the captain behind bars). You play on the "one taste and you're there" slogan by adding the hospital sign...this is very clever!
  • You've done a lot of subtle editing of the image and it makes the "reader" want to look for more of what you've done.
  • I see that you've manipulated and/or used all of the text to make your statement aside from "Puerto Rican Rum with natural coconut flavor." Could you manipulate this part of the image to go along with your analysis/statement?
~The Crucible Essay
  • Check comma usage. You are missing a lot of commas that you need, and without them, it can become hard to read.
  • You do a good job of pulling in specific quotes from the play. I see that you use these quotes to support arguments that you're making, but a deeper analysis of each quote would help make their meanings clearer. What is the author trying to say by using these quotes? What do these quotes say about specific characters? How could we relate what the characters are saying in these quotes to today?
  • You make very grand, sweeping statements in some parts. (ex. "If gossip isn't being spread at the moment the world would be lost." and "witchcraft is feared by all the books and movies that are out today.") It's fine to make these statements as long as you can back them up. Why would the world "stop" if gossip stopped? What effect does gossip have on us? Why? What does this mean about us/gossip?
  • I like how you relate each paragraph to today's society! I see you've made a personal connection with the play and you understand the relation between us and the characters in the play!
~The Crucible website
  • I like that you've included a summary of the play. This will help people who visit your website who have not read the play!
  • You have really shown a deep understanding of the idea of the 'crucible' in the play and I like how you've shown how this relates to real life (the Bolshevik Revolution).
  • Why do I go to the same website when I click on "The Crucible" link and the "Bolshevik Revolution" link?
~AP English essay
  • I like that you have given specific examples of what can happen when a corporation sponsors an aspect of school (economics class, Pepsi example).
  • I like that you are arguing that a sponsored school makes it lose education integrity, but why? I would like to see you explore this idea more throughly. How do corporate logos distract from learning? What do these logos around the school teach students that goes against what they SHOULD be learning? What are the dangers of having these logos in schools? (what "bad" things are they "saying" to students?)
  • You argue that money cannot really make learning better. Can you think of any instances when more money WOULD lead to a better education? (think technology...what can we do with better technology that we cannot do right now) Showing the other side of an argument and then arguing against it can make YOUR argument better! (I'm not saying to change your argument, because I think that you have a strong one that is WORTH arguing, but be sure to acknowledge the other side, too :)
  • I like how you say "in my own experience"...this shows that you have prior knowledge on the issue, which makes you somewhat of an authority on it!
  • What do you think about corporations sponsoring other aspects of school (like sports teams, school plays, etc.) Could THESE be beneficial? Just something to think about :)
~Online 'wikibook'
  • I like the questions that you ask at the outset. These really catch my attention and make me want to see what you've argued!
  • I love the 'learning objectives!' This lets your reader know right away what they should learn and what to look for. It really guides the reading and gives the reading a purpose! Great!
  • Good use of charts...it helps me read and understand. This is nice for visual learners.
  • Very good idea to list pros and cons.
  • I can tell that you have really researched this topic. I also like that you've given suggestions for what to do!
  • I like the questions at the end. This gives the reader a chance to reflect on what they've read.
  • Could you include something on what corporate sponsorship does to the students? How does it affect their learning? (or DOES it affect their learning?) What are these advertisements "saying" to students? Are they "teaching" students things that might go against values/ideas that SHOULD be taught in schools? Would it be okay to have these advertisements in school as long as students were taught how to be critical of them? Just some things to think about!







Model teacher research:
Grading Student Poetry: A Few Words from the Devil's Advocate

Personal Narrative Video: IT'S NOT DONE YET!!
http://www.divshare.com/download/6571386-106

Personal Narrative Sound Recording
http://www.divshare.com/download/6636895-aad